– She believed she could, so she did –
What would it mean if you could have unshakeable, unstoppable self-belief in yourself? There is a mass consciousness that often permeates society about how you should allow other people to do the important things for you. It makes life easier for example, if you hire an expert in plumbing to fix your leaking tap.
It makes good sense to delegate tasks like this to those in the know, for the ease and convenience of everyone involved.
Yet, when it comes to making important life decisions, many are quick to sign the dotted line or take the advice of other people, without first searching inside ourselves for the answer.
While there’s nothing inherently wrong with seeking the advice of someone more knowledgeable and experienced in a subject – it’s always worth asking, ‘Why can’t I know this too?’
If something really and deeply interests you, then what’s stopping you from learning it and becoming an expert in that area?
You don’t need to know it 100% – all you have to do is to become sufficiently knowledgeable in a subject and you will know more than the vast majority of people!
Beliefs are often built on the mountains of thoughts you may have over a lifetime. Affirming them repeatedly means they escalate and become entire vehicles in their own right.
You may have accumulated a lifetime of such limiting beliefs that make it difficult to make progress towards your goals.
These beliefs often have no basis in reality, yet are merely projections of the mind based off your previous experiences and expectations. You might not even realise you have them.
Learning to break through your resistance often means letting go of limiting thoughts or beliefs that do not serve you in the long-term.
This can be challenging as the resistance can bring you many feelings of uncertainty, doubt and guilt to the surface.
The best way to find release is to unwind each belief one by one. This isn’t necessarily an easy process but it can bring relief once you acknowledge each thought is simply built upon other ideas.
Ask yourself the following…
What is my earliest memory regarding this belief?
Did one event trigger a series of connections in my mind that lead me to this conclusion?
Did someone hurt me or offend me in some way, that triggered my defense mechanisms?
You may want to write down any observations you have, as you answer each of these questions. You may be surprised by what comes up for you.
If you can pinpoint the exact feeling that started the chain reaction of resistance within you, then you can begin to make real progress. By obtaining clarity on the feeling, you can begin to transform the emotions behind it – often within moments.
Here is where the magic happens. Simply observe the feeling. Recognise it. Sit with it. Feel any discomfort. You way want to do some tapping (EFT) on the energy meridian centres of the body, to see if this eases any overwhelming or painful feelings.
Allow yourself to cry. Let go. Release. Trust in the process…of letting go. Let go of any fear. Let go of any guilt. Let go of any shame.
Simply sit with the feeling and observe your thoughts and emotions. As you spend more time in this feeling, you will find yourself naturally questioning any suffocating beliefs…and by questioning, you loosen the mental and emotional bonds they are having over you.
After a few rounds of questioning, the emotion will feel looser. You will feel yourself becoming lighter and less burdened by any negative thoughts.
Keep practising this simple observational exercise…and release any thoughts that do not serve you. By being mindful of your thoughts, you begin the process of getting back on track towards success.
Society has done a very good job of getting you to think, act and behave in a certain manner. Fail to align with the majority and you may be refused support and even rejected from the group or community.
Being an outcast creates suffering and individuals in these scenarios often experience shame just for being who they are.
Self-belief has been considered a dirty word; aligned with arrogance and thinking one is better than everyone else. Self-confident people are often put down a peg or two or told they are ‘dreamers’ or need to ‘come back down to Earth’.
Such judgements are dangerous as not only are they inherently limiting, they also reinforce the standard mentality of the masses.
Brainwashing starts young, from the media and society at large who sell an ideal of what men and women should look like. This applies to beauty, personality and standards of success. Society creates so many expectations…is it any wonder you may be feeling like you simply can’t measure up?!
By encouraging you to be so judgemental, it is simply creating more disharmony, discord and dis-ease in your life.
You are unique. Celebrate you. Regardless of what other people may have achieved. You are not in competition with anyone except yourself. So celebrate with them. Then go back to celebrating you.
Your value doesn’t lie in your appearance. Or in superficial things such as money or status. It may feel like everything you do needs to be done for gain or recognition by others to be see as valuable – yet this is inherently wrong.
Life is a mirror and it reflects back your beliefs. If you believe in and value yourself, you are happy as you are. You do not seek outside validation as you recognise the constantly changing nature of external reality.
Nothing you can buy or achieve outside of yourself can give you the peace, love and self-worth you are seeking. It is already within. All you have to do is remember to turn it on and search for it within yourself…
How do you ensure you keep your light switched on, even when you feel like hiding away from the world? Nurturing your self-belief requires a lot of patience and persistence.
It’s not a one-stop solution but rather a journey that means you place your own personal wellbeing above whatever is happening all around you.
Meditation is one mindfulness tool that can ensure you keep your light burning bright. This is essential when all else is falling all around you.
If you’ve never meditated before you may want to consider ‘Master Your Mind’, an in-depth 5-week meditation course that can help you to cultivate peace and clarity, find your centre, sharpen your mind and expand your awareness.
Being aware of your breathing is another method to enhance your awareness. Counting the number of inhales or exhales can make a big difference in reducing your anxiety levels.
Affirming positive intentions with the use of mantras can help your mind to stay focused in the right direction.
A good mantra to get started with include slowly repeating the word ‘Om’ as you relax into your breathing rhythm.
‘Peace’ is another beautiful mantra, as is ‘I am Love’ or ‘All is well’. Repeating positive or uplifting mantras can enhance your energies and make you feel good.
Random acts of kindness can also have a beautiful impact on the world around you. Helping others makes you feel good on the inside – so it shows on the outside.
Simply being there for a friend, helping an elderly neighbour with their shopping or taking time out of your day to volunteer for an hour or two can all create good karma, both for you and your community.
What’s essential throughout the process of working towards true self-love is to honour yourself. Don’t do things that don’t feel right or cross your boundaries.
Even when everything feels like it’s falling apart. Or nothing is going your way. Honour your instincts, trust your intuition and have faith that you are always being protected and provided for.
The more you look within, the clearer this will become. The more you act from the heart, the more you can bravely shine your light out into the world. And become a confident activist for what’s important to you.
When you do this, you realise that the darkness was simply an illusion – created by the parts of yourself that remained covered…and are now disappearing in the light of your own love.